The Spit Up: Reject your partners gift

inb4 Charizard

The Buizel: Hide in the closet, once someone is close, abduct them and rape

The Zubat: Okay, this one's pretty intense. At midnight, have your partner lie on a bed .Tie their hands behind their back, and glue (yes, glue) a blindfold to over their eyes. While you do this whisper this into their ear seductively: "When I say 'go,' I want you to chase me. When you catch up you can do whatever you want to me." After all this is done, move to the bedroom door and scream "GO!" Quickly bolt out of the room and dash to the circuit breaker. (Don't worry, unless your partner is a ninja, they won't catch up.) Kill every light in the house.By now your partner should be completely lost. Desperate for direction, they'll follow your voice anywhere. Lure them into tripping over furniture and running into walls. Every time they injure themself, bellow "IT HURT ITSELF IN ITS CONFUSION!"

Once they're unconscious, do with them as you like

The Entai:

Your partner ties you down and performs sexual acts with ice. Then, once you're shivering, you untie yourself and run away, prompting them to chase you for sexual release.

>>6975501

The Legendary Dog: A variation of the Abra. Only difference is that while fleeing, you let your partner catch up with you. Just as they're about to re-engage, flee again. Repeat as many times as possible.

The Suicune: A variation of The Legendary Dog. Pelt partner with Ice Cubes, as they chase you.

The Raikou: A variation of The Legendary Dog. Electrocute partner with a tazer, whenever they catch up with you.

The Entei: A variation of The Legendary Dog. Set yourself on fire, as you initially run away.

The Pikachu: Grab a car battery and jumper cables, clamping one side to your partners nipples and touch the other side to the battery, screaming "CHUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!!!!!!!!!" Each time

The Smeargle: Watch porn for a couple of hours, learn four different sexual positions and repeat on your partner.

The Magikarp: A variation of missionary. Only instead of penetrating, collapse on top of your partner and begin to flop wildly about like a fish. Really try to crush them under your torso. As your partner begins to scream, begin to quietly mutter "It's not very effective..." over and over again.

The Shuckle: Stuff berries into your briefs and leave them there for a week. Before intercourse, have partner unclothe you. Right before they take off your pants, say as sexily as possible "Be careful, I'm making rare candy."

The Flareon: No sex life

The Eeveelutions: Before intercourse, lead partner to a table. On this table you should have spread out the following items: 1.) A Super Soaker, 2) A Taser, 3) A Burning Candle dripping in melted wax, 4) A Blindfold, 5) A Tin Foil Hat, 6) A Tray of Ice Cubes, 7) A Rose.

Gesture to this display, and say "Alright, there are seven ways we can do this..."

The Blastoise: A variation of the Charizard. At climax, grab two fully charged Super Soakers and blast your partner's face at point blank range. Afterwards, proceed to run about the room shooting everything in sight, while screaming "You don't have enough badges to control me!"

The Brock: Do it with your eyes closed.

The Misty: DO IT IN A KIDDIE POOL!

The Erika: Do it while another dude watches.

>>6975765
WITH MY LITTLE SISTER

The Hitmontop: Stand on your head and spin rapidly while your partner is slapped in the face with your dick until she catches it in her mouth.

When she finally catches it, start kicking her in the head.

The Sabrina: Set up a creepy American Girls doll at the foot of the bed, so that it watches everything you and your partner do.

The Koga: Plexiglass with a hole in it.

The Blaine: Taunt partner from behind a locked door.

The Giovanni: Teleconference with employees, during intercourse. Like a boss.

The Voltorb: Explode during the first round.

The Hypno: Before, during, and after intercourse, stare at your partner. Do this all. night. long.
If your partner comments, say nothing. Just keep staring. If partner leaves, follow them. Do not speak. Do not put on clothes. Just follow. And stare.

The Caterpie: At climax, discharge two cans of Silly String across your partner's body. Taunt them, by yelling their speed has now been reduced.

>>6975825
isn't that surge?

The Porygon: Call a phone-sex line, stay on the line until your bank account is empty.

The Ditto: Do it with a transvestite

The Porygon: Buy a RealDoll.

The Psyduck: Stare at her with your hands on your head looking at her confused.

The Slowpoke: Stick your dick in her vagina then pull out everytime you feel a bite.

The Ludicolo: Turn Mexican music on and start dancing on top of her saying Ludicolo(or any variation) over and over.

The

>>6975911
Nah, man. Blaine had all those locked doors that could only be opened by riddles or battles.

Of course since these are Pokemon sex moves, you can only ever know four at any time.

The Pelipper: Give your partner a blowjob, and be sure to swallow. Following this, demand a kiss from your partner, at which point you vomit the jizz back into his mouth and tell him your defence and special defence both just dropped a stage.

The Payday: During intercourse, beat your partner with a sock filled with loose change. They get to keep any coins that fall out of the sock.

>>6975874
>>6975681
Best

The HM: Not a sexual move, per se. However, whenever a partner expresses being traumatized by any Pokemon-related sex move, you respond "It cannot be unlearned."

The Weezing: Restrict your partner to a chair with rope. Take off his/her clothes, then dip your hands in sludge. Slowly wipe the filth on your partner's nipples/breasts, moaning and coughing. Once horny, grab any machine that uses diesel as fuel and run it in the closed room. Your partner will cough. Then proceed to violently beat them on the chest. If they cough blood, shove a cupof sludge down their mouth and close it so they don't vomit. Then proceed to fuck until finished/dead.

The Snorlax: A move for fatties. After climax, collapse on your partner and refuse to move. Bonus points if you actually manage to fall asleep, with the partner trapped under you.

The Oak: If your partner reachers for a condom or sex toy, you echo "This isn't the time to use that"

The Snorlax: (Alternate) Demand your partner play a flute the whole time. If they ever stop, collapse.

The Tropius: Similar to the HM, except all your sex moves are pokemon sex moves which cannot be unlearned.

The Tyranitar:
Keep large bag of sand at bedside; every so often throw copious amounts of sand at partner.

The Legendary Bird: Requires you to sit in a one-person swing. Partner is not allowed to stand. Instead, they must also cling to the sides of the swing, throughout intercourse. If they ever fall, dismiss them.

The Articuno: Variation of the Legendary Bird. Suspend the swing over a kiddie pool filled to the brim with dry ice.

The Mach Punch: Before any foreplay, punch in the teeth.

The Buneary: Hop up and down on your partner during love making sessions

The Aerodactly: Flap your arms and run around the house chasing her/him

The Metapod: Don't move and keep your dick hardened at all times

The Zapdos: Variation of the Legendary Bird, with a one-two whammy. Suspend swing over a kiddie pool filled with water. In the middle of intercourse have an accomplice run into the room and throw an active car battery into the pool.

The Crasher Wake: Wear a luchador mask and sing your theme tune during intercourse. If your partner complains, just laugh and hand them a Piplup mask.

The Moltres: Variation of the Legendary Bird, with a one-two-three whammy. Suspend swing over a bed of coals. In the middle of intercourse have an accomplice run into the room and light the coals. If partner continues to maintain grip on the swing, the accomplice proceeds to douse the rest of the surrounding floor with gasoline.

The Quagsire: Suggest having sex outside; lie on the grass and faint.

THE GOD BIRDS: Variation of the Legendary Bird, with swing suspended from high-rise ceiling. The height should be fatal.

The Diglett: Stay completly hidden in a cloak/sheet with only your penis sticking out

The Dugtrio: You and 2 friends

The Ho-Oh: Variation of the God Birds. During Intercourse, have entire house set on fire.

The 4th Gen: When things start getting hot, start hiding rocks in inconspicuous places.

The Meloetta: Dress like a beautiful woman to seduce an unsuspecting man, then sing a song, whilst revealing that you are indeed a man.

The Chansey: Give handjob, while wearing oven mits. Use egg whites for lube.

The Politoed/Kyogre: Do it in the shower

>>6976150
PROMOTIONS!

The Beedrill: During sex pull out two spears and proceed to chase your partner

The Bonemerang: Whip your partner in the face with your dick, over and over. Once they faint, commence intercourse.

The Pidgeot: Be amazing for 10-15 minutes then get forgotten about for the rest fo your life

The Blaziken: Record yourself doing it with your partner in public to post it on the internt as a porno. Fuck your partner quickly and intensely until everyone declares that you are too good to be online.

The Solosis: Procreate

The Meowth: During climax, fling hand-fulls of coins into the air, while shrieking "DAT'S RIGHT!" in a faux brooklyn accent.

The Legendary Pokemon : Don't.

The Forced Evolution: When performing doggy style, stick a decent sized stone into the partner's anus

The Gardevoir: Dress up as the opposite gender, meet someone of your same gender, take home, then reveal your true identity

The Absol: Bring your partner in close, and just prior to intercourse- SUCKER PUNCH

The Slaking: Just before your partner reaches an orgasm, pull out and refuse to do anything for five minutes. Repeat as necessary.

The Ivysaur: Use Sleep Powder. It's super effective.

The Halted Evolution: When your partner is about to come, start punching them and shrieking "B button, B button!" at the top of your lungs.

The Stunfisk: Look extremely derpy and distant during the entire act, then smile creepily when you come.

The Keckleon: Beat your partner and tell them they have to change

The Helping Hand: see Dutch Rudder.

>>6976252

The Scraggy: Dress up like a gangster with loose pants. Before performing the act, pull pants up and let them fall to reveal your erection.

The Eviolite: Last twice as long while under the age of 16.

slightly disappoint this wasn't posted before

The Jigglypuff: (SFW VERSION) Any position, as long as you insist upon singing noisily the entire time.

The Aerodactyl: during sex, pull out and proceed to pin your partner's shoulders down with your knees, then flap your arms and screech madly down at her.

The Breeder: Do it at the local daycare center.

The Jirachi: Do whatever they want for a week and then sleep until you die.

The Cleffa: Claim that you can't have sex because your partner hasn't made you happy enough

The Jigglypuff: (NSFW VERSION) Same as the normal Jigglypuff. Only difference is that you first drug your partner and take them to a seedy motel. Try insure that intercourse occurs as they lose consciousness. After they pass out, doodle on their body with a permanent marker and promptly leave them to pay for the room.

The Yanmega: play coy and defensive for say 2 mins, they proceed to take your partner in a fast and hostile manner. Avoid anything with rocks like the plague.

The Entei: YOU ARE MOMMA

The Jigglypuff: (Post-sex version) If your partner fell asleep after finishing, draw on their face.

The Jinx: Dress your partner in drag and force them to sing RuPaul as foreplay

The Skitty: Have sex with a morbidly obese man

The Wailord : have sex with a midget.

>>6976333
>>6976359
I don't think you understand what (N)SFW actually means.

>>6976375
The Opponent used Stealth STD

OHSHI-

The Joey: Call everyone you know and tell them how good it was.

The Whimsicott: Always make sure that whatever you do will go first.

the Ninjask: Cum in three minutes or less.

The Smogon: During sex throw pointed rocks on the bed and Sand into their face

The Barry: Fine your partner if you come before them.

The Gary: After sex write 'Gary was here, Ash is a loser' onto your partner's body in permenant marker

The Breloom: Ensure that your partner is asleep. Place in front of him/her a dummy doppelganger of yourself. When he/she awakes and becomes preoccupied with your substitute, punch them in the neck.

The Ferrothorn: Have gay sex because Ferrothorn is a faggot.

The Politoed: Cum buckets.

The Audino: Do it with someone who is much less experienced than you.

The Latios: Do it with your sister

The Garchomp: Dance around your partner holding swords, and then proceed to have sex with them in a rage-like manner for 10-15mins. After said time period has passed, stop having sex with them and begin to hurt yourself repetitively.

The Gliscor: Observe your prey while hanging inverted from branches. When the chance presents itself, you swoop!

The Spinarak: Sketch a poorly drawn face on your ass; try to convince your partner that it is your actual face.

The Slowpoke: Remain completely motionless and stare vacantly throughout intercourse. One hour later, begin loudly moaning in pleasure while your partner tries to sleep.

The Samurott: In a kiddie pool, place partner on fours and say "The water is calm, would you like to surf?", if answer is "yes" start intercourse, if its "no", drown.

The Kricketune: Deeleelee-whoop her shit.

The Shell Smash: Rip off your condom, and finish hard and fast.

The Boogie: Tease your partner beyond human capability.

the squirtle: fill water gun with semen, hide under something like it were your shell then jump out and use water gun on partner. After water gun empty put on cool sunglasses and nod once.

The Krookodile/moxie: Wear sunglasses during intercourse. After you partner has climaxed stand up and yell " MY ATTACK POWER INCREASED!" the begin to have sex with your partner again. Repeat this until partner is unconscious.

The Aqua Ring: Everytime you're about to climax, pull out and rinse your penis with cold water, then continue intercourse. Repeat as necessary.

The V-Create: Take a flamethrower and torch everything in sight. Start quickly, but as you go on, slow down and disrobe sensually

Legendary Status: Forever Abstinent.

The Tropius: Use the same 4 moves over and over and over...

This thread is GLORIOUS!

The Grimer: Coat yourself in Smuckers, beforehand.

>>6975843
I think they showed this one on Entourage

The Electrode: Disguise yourself as someone your partner actually trusts. Attack, when it is too late.

The Pokemaniac: Furry.

The Bill: You have no partner. However you have loads of great material on your computer.

The Poliwag: Don't use your hands.

The Shedinja: Just sit there.

>>6976549

I dont get it

>>6976574

Same here

The Relicanth: While having sex with your partner in a pool, remain stoic and calm for the duration of intercourse. However, right before you climax announce "The sea is deep here. Would you like to dive?" Before they answer, scream "YES!" and drag them under the water.

The Kangaskhan: Man... no I can´t do it ;_;

Someone please archive this

The Jinx: immediately after intercourse get up, put on your partner's clothes, and leave.

The Rotom: Marathon sex session, where you bang your partner in the the garage, then in the kitchen, then in the living room, and finishing off with your partner on top of the washing machine.

Swalot

Self explanatory

The Kyurem: Before sex, the woman fills her vag with ice cubes. Then she turns to her partner and says "Are you man enough to brave my Giant Chasm?"

>>6983192
>Politoed's Drizzle made it rain cum!
>Audino's know for EXP grinding

The Cubone: ...actually, forget it. It's way too kinky for you kids.

>>6983678
Oh...oh god....

The Cubone: autoerotic asphyxiation while wearing your mom's clothes.

The Tangela: Tie a woman to a chair using so much rope that you can barely see her body. Then fuck a pile of rope, while she's forced to watch.

The Lopunny: When your GF catches you with another woman, scream "IT'S NOT MY FAULT! SHE HAS CUTE CHARM!"

The Charizard. Right before you're about to cum, light her pubes on fire, and swing your arms like a bird saying "YOU CAN'T TRAIN ME!"

The Starmie: Place partner on back with ass in the air. Fuck partner with all your limbs off the ground and outstretched like a star, and spin around.

The Kangaskhan: Bang a pregnant woman. After sex, mega punch her in the stomach.

The Zoroark: After sex, reveal to your partner that you are really your own twin sibling. Hilarity will ensue.

>>6975811
The Mr Mime: Perform the Koga, without speaking.

The Quagsire: Repeatedly bump your head against her pussy. Even if she asks you to quit it, don't respond, and keep going. Even when she finally gets tired of it and leaves, keep bumping your head where she was just laying. (Intermittent exclamations of "Quaaaaag~" are optional)

The Darmanitan: Start off with all the energy you've got. When you begin to lose steam, cover your ears with your hands, put on a big, wide-eyed frown, and don't move or speak. When you feel rested up, go at it with all your strength once again. Lather, rinse, and repeat until you cum.

The Krabby: Pinch them sharply and repeatedly during intercourse while foaming at the mouth.

The Mudkip: Film you and your partner doing it, post it on the internet, and become a sensation.

Alternate: While doing it, have a nonstop conversation of "Mud?" "Kip!" with your partner until orgasm.

The Ghastly: Sensually lick your partner, while they're asleep.

The Kyurem: Before intercourse screech and cover everything with ice.

>>6983987
Tecnically, the baby Kangaskhan is out with mama, A chansey make more sense

>>6984330
The Haunter: Wake up paralyzed with fear.

The deoxys: spread a venereal disease

>>6984618
The Gengar: Sneak into partners house while they are away, and hide. (Preferably you should find a place in their bedroom, but anyplace will do. The important thing is you not get caught.) Remain hidden for hours. Your partner comes home. They make dinner. They bathe. They watch the late program. All the while you lurk and wait. Finally, after your partner goes to bed and has been asleep for at least an hour, sneak into their room. Creep up to the head of their bead and grin wildly. Then insert your tongue into their ear and probe as deeply into their auditory channel as possible, until your partner awakens. At this point, you should cover their mouth with your hand, and calmly explain "[Your name] used Dream eater. It's not very effective. [Partner's Name] woke up." Then furiously scream "CURSE!" as you violently cut both you and your partner's clothes off with a knife. Finally, hold the knife to your partner's throat and engage in normal, happy, consensual, intercourse. Every few moments slash at the air with your knife, while crying out "NIGHTSHADE! NIGHTSHADE!"

>>6984689

>>6976343
I lol'd

>>6984689

The Cofagrigus: hide in your partner's closet. When they turn out there lights to go to bed, begin whispering softly. When they open the closet to investigate, drag them in and [engage in safe, sane, mutually beneficial, consensual intercourse] UNTIL THE PATHETIC [sexual partner] CAN'T REMEMBER WHAT SUNLIGHT FELT LIKE!

the Zoroark: wear a mask and clothes of the opposing gender until your partner tries to initiate the wrong kind of intercourse, then rip it all off and be dominant

The Wobbuffet: Grimace and tense up your entire body, prior to intercourse. Refuse to move at all from this position, until your partner climaxes. Then go wild with everything you've got. Ride them like a mechanical bull.

Optional: Shout "WOBBA! WOBBA! WOBBUFFET!" during phase two.

The Jellicent: Suggest the idea of sex in the pool to your partner. (Hopefully it's in-ground, at least 10 feet deep) Float around the surface while doing it, but right when your partner is about to reach orgasm, you cover their mouth with your hand and pull them down to the bottom of the pool. This part is crucial, because not only must you be stronger than your partner by enough to wrestle them down to the bottom with relatively no trouble, but you must be able to hold your breath for longer. (Although you still have the element of surprise on your side, so you should be good) Once your partner's cold, lifeless body floats back up to the top, finish having sex with the body, and then finally absorb what life energy remains.

The Double-team: bring in friends wearing masks of your face and gang bang her

>>6985001

The Garbodor: Burp in your partner's face until he/she slips into a coma. If said partner begins to vomit, eat their vomit and continue the burping until the coma happens. While comatose, begin raping your vict-- err, partner's limp, unresisting body. Follow up by dumping the contents of the nearest trash can on them.

The Joltik: Get it on with a giantess. Crawl inside her vagina and wriggle around like there's no tomorrow. Also bring some tasers for extra fun.

The Pikachu: Have sex for so long that you lose weight and grow taller

>>6984689
sounds fuckin HOT without the pokemon references

the shedinja
stand naked outside doing goatse
absorb the souls of all that stare into the abysmal hole

>>6983256
Only needs 3 more requests on chanarchive.

how do you request archive
and where are they stored for viewing?

Really guys? No Missingno?

The Moxie: Begin to have sex with your partner slowly and calmly, until you/they climax, then repeat, but more aggressive. Repeat until either person faints and/or falls asleep/

The Charizard v2:

As soon as she appears in the bedroom, throw pointed stones at her.

>>6985345

I lol'd so fucking hard I have no image that describes the level of lulz I have achieved.

>>6986057
thank you
thank you
ill be here all night

any pokemon with oblivious
you woman strips naked
you stay soft

The Roark
First you deprive yourself of water for up to 2 days prior to sex. You then tell your partner to take you up the ass as soon as possible before yelling "POINTED STONES DUG INTO YOUR PENIS" when your shit scratches his member.

the Ivysaur
fuck like normal jump up open the curtains to reveal sun while fapping yelling absorbing sunlight
turn around while cumming in her face screaming Solarbeam bitches

>bitches cause there better be 2 or more

hoppip using memento

fuck for 2 seconds then kill yourself so someone so much better than you can do it right

The Entry Hazard: The night before lay out stones and spikes on the bed.

Yes, I know string shot has been synonymous with orgasm, but I always saw it as tying up and gagging the opponent so they can't run away or say no.

The Marowak: impregnate your partner, wait nine months, then after she gives birth, murder her, fashion a helmet out of her skull, put the skull-helmet on the baby and abandon it in the wilderness.

The Smogonfag:

Take your partner to a desert during a sandstorm, fuck her whilst throwing stones and spikes at her feet.

then beat the shit out of her before coming.

Memento: Place really (seriously) strong glue on your dick just before you enter. Wait for a while, then kill yourself. Your partner will have your dead dick still inside of them, unavailable to get you out.

The Dragon Rage: Get your partner to give you a blowjob, and just as you come, punch her in the stomach so cum flies out of her nose.

>>6988605 I can't believe I spelled cum wrong. >.<

EPIC THREAD, THIS ONE SURE IT ITS

The CroBat- Beat her dead for 30 seconds with a crow-bar and then 30 seconds with a bat and then rape her lifeless corpse. Trust me fellas it works

The Crobat.

The Machoke: You and your partner frot, through wearing black jockie shorts. The shorts cannot come off under any circumstances.

can some plz screencap this epicness!!!!!

The Machop: The Machoke, if one of the participants is a minor.

The Silver: Peep on a girl all day, then break through a window and take what you want.

The Hydropump: A hetero move. In a Jacuzzi, the girl stands so that her vag is directly in front of one of the jets. Set jets to FULL POWER, while you do her in the ass.

The Mew: Have yourself cloned without your knowledge, have clone barge in your room while you're having sex with partner and try to kill you.

The Bulbasaur: The dude inserts Sunflower seeds urethra, prior to intercourse. (PROTIP: Use unsalted, because that shit STINGS!) When you finally cum, scream "LEECH SEED!" As your partner picks jizz covered seeds out of themself, strut about the room declaring "I gained a little Hp!"

>>6989439

The Weather Trio: Dress yourself in blue (remember to place plenty of ice cubes in your pants) and request that your partner dress in red (with several live coal in his/her pants). Have rough, violent intercourse and right as you both are about to cum, have a third friend (dressed in green) yell, "STOP IT!", wheel in an industrial fan, turn it on, and separate you and your partner.

>The Machamp
It's only possible in a threesome. You and one of your friends both shove two fists each into the third at a speed of 125 pushes/second

The Kangaskhan - Have sex with your partner while a baby is strapped to your stomach.

One more vote for archiving, gaise

The Kingler: Attach clamps all over your partners body, while frothing at the mouth.

i am this close wanting to make a pokemon book of genesis version. i'll make cynthia be eve. who should be adam?

OP HERE:

congrats, this thread has been requested 6 times and will now be archived: http://chanarchive.org/4chan/vp/

Feels good man.
Like skull-fucking Deoxys in space.

>>6990119
Stephen Stone. For he was first.

The Alakazam: Stick bent spoons up your partner's ass then cum in their ear saying "Alakazam used Psychic"

The Clefairy: Pound her, and don't stop.

The Clefairy: Meet at midnight, outdoors. Bring as many friends as possible. Strip naked and dance about, as foreplay. If anyone shows up, scatter.

The Castform: When cumming, shout "Castform used Rain Dance!" and mount her quickly saying "X's swift swim activated!".

The League Champion: After letting four other dudes gang bang a girl silly, barge into the room and challenge her to resist.

The heatran: Have sex on all fours, then hit your partner with a shovel as you cum, and toss the body into a volcano.

The Zweilous Evolution: After already coupling with your partner, introduce a third participant.

The Surf: A group sex move. Upon climaxing, hit all other participants with your jizz.

The Deino: For the longest time you're single, forever alone. It makes you bitter, abusive, and blind to those around you. Then, late in the game you find someone who's the same way. You become a couple, and you wish you could say you were happy, but no. Instead you're just a pair of miserable bastards. However, just when you're settling into this routine you let a third member into your life. You think you'll be a pissed off polyamorous posse. BUT NO! New guy turns out me be Mr Alpha, and neither you nor your partner have the stones to fight back, so he just keeps ordering you around.

for the rest of your life...

>>6995188

That had nothing to do with sex.

The Cacturne: All parties take two tabs of mescaline and fuck in haunted house attraction.

The BrocK: after intercourse, steal his penis.

The Vulpix: Take it in the ass six times in a row.

>>6995512
With all due respect, you suck.
Allow me to help.

The Vulpix: An anal trick done at a bar. You lean across the counter. While your partner takes you from behind, you must try to successfully mix, light, and down six Flaming Assholes before before your partner comes.

If you can do nine, you evolve to The Ninetales.

>>6995725
This from the guy who can't spell "cums."

>>6982236
The Geodude: Only use your hands.

tHe Mi5sINgn0: A STRAIGHT MO0VE! It must be performed from a second-story room with a window that overlooks a fairly deep swimming pool, with a high-dive board. First off, the chick pours a cup of steaming coffee onto the dude's cock. Ahh, he now feels great. So, he performs a "Catch the Weedle" [Attaches a tiny viking helm to his dick and shoves it up her ass, refusing to let it out} on her. After this, both parties dive through the window (PROTIP: Don't open the window, just dive through the glass. You gotta do this as soon as the Weedle's been caught!] and fall into the pool below. nOW, the woman starts swimming laps, while the dude races up the high dive ladDer. On her next lap towards the high dive board, the chick flips onto her back, and spreads her legs, meanwhile, the dude tries to bellyflop ontop of her, so that his cock lands right in her vajjjjjjjj with the force of a jizzing Wailord. If he does this right, both will violently collide with to the pool's bottom and then be gently lifted back to the surface.

The goal of a Missingno is to cum, just as her skull cracks against the pool's bottom. If you fail to accomplish this, then you have merely performed The 999.

If you successfully perform The Missingno, it is customary to snort 128 mg of the drug of your choice as a cool-down exorcize.

The F.E.A.R. Rattata: Have your partner bring you close to orgasm, but not give you one. Then do the same for your partner. Then tell him/her to then get on the bed to procede with regular sex, but instead of doing so quickly cum inside them. Then leave.

The Bisharp: Tie Knives to your arms, legs, and torso, proceed as you like. If your partner resists, bellow "DEFIANT!" and cut them.

The Beartic: No teeth? No problem! This little trick will make em shiver with joy. Pop out your dentures and fill your maw with some ice cubes. Wait until your gums are physically cold to the touch. Use this time to spray your pubes with a white highlighter. Immediately thereafter, lunge upon your partner and give them the slipperiest, chilliest oral of their life.

As they gasp for breath and begin to ask you what all that was about, roar and fuck them blind with your huge throbbing erection.

The Throh: After intercourse, put on your robe and defenestrate your partner..

The Swoobat: Show her sum loving with your nose. Nuzzle her naughty bits to climax.

The Darkrai: Fuck in total darkness. Right before you cum, hiss "From this night on the only thing you will ever see is your nightmares." As you orgasm, drive your thumbs through your partner's eye sockets.

The Griseous Orb: Bang an amputee while their suspended from a swing.

Hard Stone: Viagra

>>6995725
That... actually sounds viable.

But Rare Candy's the blue pill.

The Floatzel: You and your partner don water wings on both your arms AND your legs. Then proceed to bang in any body of water.

>>6999219

Miracle Seed: Condom breaks.

The Castform: Begin intercourse cheerfully and enthusiastic about the proceedings. As it continues, grow steadily moodier. By the end you should be crying and verbally abusing your partner.

The Unfeazent: Have sex while wearing a tasseled pink Victorian era mask.

The Timburr: Have sex in a construction site, afterwards beat your partner with a 2x4.

>>6976150
This is my new fetish.

The Swadloon: Wrap oneself in a palm leaf, then site on you partner while having sex, then finish by assuming the batman pose and yell I am the god damn swadloon.

The Magnemite: You love to hover around and watch.

>>6975925
The Porygon 2: Empty your wife's bank account on a phone-sex line.

The Snorlax: After intercourse, collpase in the doorway to the room it was performed in.
When your partner asks you to move just say "There's a Snorlax blocking the path!"
Do not move until they put on your favorite song

>>7000687
The Porygon-Z: Hack a stragner's bank account for sex-line use.

>>7000687
The Porygon-Z: A phone-sex line empties its bank account calling you.

The Smogon: You have to suck at sex unless you want to be banned.

The Sudowoodo: Refuse to do anything, until your partner can get you wet.

>>7000614
The Magneton: You love to hover around and watch...with friends.

The Destiny Bond:If you cum, it makes them cum. Vice versa.

The Will-O-Wisp:
Glue sandpaper to your dick and commence intercourse. The opponent was burned!

The Toxic: Get AIDs and then have sex.

The Sleep Powder:
During intercourse, sprinkle powder based chloroform onto your partner's face. If you aim at her nose it's 75% chance of sleep.

The Samurott: Have sex while wearing a unicorn seashell and screaming "Aqua Jet" and finishing first.

The Assist:
invite 5 friends over and then start having sex with your partner ion the same room. have friends line up behind you. At any given moment yell ASSIST!
Then you yell out "[Friend name] assisted [your name]".
Stop what you're doing, get out the way and let your friend do any Pokemon sexual move on them for 30 seconds, then resume. Repeat until climax for the partner.

The Extremespeed:
You have already done this move.

The Groudon/Sunny Day: Do it in a Sauna.

>>7001031

Okay that is fucking HOT

The Stealth Rock:
Stab your partner with something sharp every time you change positions

The Toxic Spikes:
Hide vaccines containing AIDS inside the matress.

The Hoenn: Fuck at the sound of Trumpets. Bonus points if you're the one playing them.

Beat Up: Punch your partner then get 5 of your friends to take turns and join in.

The Magikarp: Lie on the bed naked as your partner does various acts, but keep repeating "nothing happened" while you flop around

>>7003843
The Johto: Go on a long and arduous journey to the league, then fuck in your neighbours house.

>>7004094

The Sinnoh: No fire-type sex moves allowed.

The Charmander: Light a candle. Tell your partner that when it goes out, she will die.

The Digimon: "Rip-off" your partners clothes, don't enjoy it much. Then suddenly become better at sex with other partners in the future, people start to like you more.

The Kangaskhan: Have sex with your friend's mother while your friend is in the room.

The Politoed/Drizzle: The second intercourse begins, cum.

The Crustle: Have an obese man do you doggy style while he puts all of his weight on your back, try to hold yourself up.

More like: start off absolutely amazing then become complete and utter shit at the end and NEVER FINISH.

This thread is genius!